I've really be neglecting Blogspot lately. I guess I kinda miss it. I've been into Tumblr lately, not gonna lie. I guess I need more than one outlet now a days?

I've been chilling in my studio for so effing long, trying to squeeze out the creative juices out of my head. I'm totally drained. Mind you I haven't studied at ALL for tomorrow's exam. I shouldn't have taken that nap :(

Anyway things have been so weird lately, I'm kinda sad I can't call my life chill anymore. It's all just so weird. I can't wrap my mind around it. I've never felt so clueless about life before, haha! Not going to lie, I usually know what I'm doing (consciously) and it's either I do it or I don't. But right now it seems like, I'm running around blindfolded, because when I think I know what I'm doing, it just turns out I'm wrong. People are pulling me around in different directions, but it never feels right. Correct me if I'm wrong, but shouldn't doing the right thing feel right? at least in one way or another?

I don't know. I feel so targeted, so vulnerable right now. I feel like my strong willed personality was just wearing a mask all along. I feel like I was just trying to hide my weaknesses, and now they're tearing their way to the surface.


nts: The life I live in this world is simply a moment, a point, a nothing, in comparison of unfathomable eternity. Why waste the limited time I have here on all these silly problems?


k peace Longest weekend without him. Never knew how difficult it was! I hate to admit how dependant I've become. C'mon Lanie!!! Get a grip! Only two more days.... only two more days...


Pretty sure no one reads my blogspot anymore. I think life's all about twitter now a days. I'm gonna go to bed early today. It's not like I'm talking to anyone tonight *cries*

PS, I am SO excited for Harry Potter, Jonas Brother's Concert, Transformers 2 and New Moon (not gonna lie). And I keep hearing UP was the shit. I wanna watch it :( Someone wanna watch with me? oh and.. I haven't seen startrek either HAHA! I'm so out of the loop! It's ok gotta save up for Boston&NewYork trip. Super super excited :$:$ Can't wait for this summer!!!! UGH!!

Loving in the cooler temps right now too. I'm better off not frying and sweating while I'm on the computer :)


I'll blog when school's over! bye blogging takes too long. twitter is the shit! it's all i've been doing this past week. I'm scared to go back to school tomorrow because I haven't been there in four days :( such a bad time to get sick. i got a little more than a week to prepare for exams now... and i probably have to catch up on all that i missed too. hopefully i'll survive tomorrow... despite the heat, which will probably make it 20 times worse. I just want to go to school and feel better already!!!!